City Slickers

Alright, everyone. You have to promise not to laugh!was modest ranch with one main house, a barn, and
But here it goes; being a city girl I never knew justtwo equipment sheds and the horse stable. Mr. Daniels,
what was meant by living the country life, so when thewalked over to a little house with fence material
opportunity to purchase 1000 acres of farmland inaround it, next to the barn. What's this? Nancy said, as
Pecos Texas, came my way, I couldn't pass it up. Toshe took two steps back. It's a chicken coup? I said, as
become a real life cowgirl, that thought made myI laughed, and you said I was the city girl that couldn't
entire family laugh. My sister Nancy laughed, as shetell the difference between a chicken and a pigeon.
said" Anna, you as a cowgirl? You don't even knowLaughing at us both Mr. Daniels reached in and
the difference between and chicken and a pigeon." Igrabbed a chicken by the neck, as he put the chicken
do so! I said the chicken gives you eggs and thedown on the block and hacked off the head Nancy
pigeon gives us droppings all over our deck out there.yelled, "Oh My God," "Oh My God", and then fainted. It
As we looked at the land survey and started makingwas the funniest thing I've seen in a long while. After
plans on what to do, and how much live-stock to have,Mr. Daniels and I pick as she fainted and fell to the barn
Nancy said "are you really going to milk a cow at 4floor. After Mr. Daniels and I picked Nancy up off the
am in the morning or muck out the stalls. Of course Ibarn floor, we walked back to the house and boiled
will, I said. It can't be any worse than mucking out thatthe chicken and plucked the feathers off it. Once we
doorway downstairs before we can leave. We beganlearned how to do that, Mr. Daniels cooked dinner and
laughing at that thought.we laughed some more at Nancy fainting.
The real fun didn't start until my sister and I hit the road,Well its morning and it's time to hit the road, where are
on our journey to become city slickers. Our first stopyou ladies heading too Mr. Daniels asked? We are on
was in West Virginia, where we found this quaint littleour way to Texas, I said, were we brought a 1000
town called Welch. When you look around, you canacre farm. Well I suggest you get some farm hands,
see that the modern times haven't touched this town.because that one won't be able to eat, as he laughed
When we walked into the dinner/bar, they all stoppedat Nancy, I laughed too and said I'll be working the farm
and looked at us, "all three of them." We laughed andshe's going to work on the house. We thank Mr.
asked do you know of a good place to sleep? The bigDaniels for all his hospitality and started on that long
strapping guy with short crop black hair and oceanroad again.
blue eyes, which sat at the end of the bar said, I don'tWell it's three days later and we have arrived in
think you ladies want to stay around here; there aren'tTexas, Hooray! As we drove across interstate 10, we
any five star hotels! Just a bed and breakfast withcouldn't help but notice that everything out here is
some home cooked meals. We looked at each otherfarmland. Where's the Wal-Mart! Never mind the
and said ok, were do we find it! He pointed to theWal-Mart! Nancy said where the Star bucks is! I need
stairs, left of the door, and said. Up there and to youra cup of coffee. Well you aren't going to see no
left 20 bucks a night. Laughing we laid the twenty onStarbucks out here I said, laughing. If there's no Star
the bar and said thank you. After a good night sleepbucks take me home. You are home, as I pointed up
and a really good breakfast, (all home made asthe dirt road to the land. What the - Nancy said, am I
promised). We thank them for their hospitality and hitsuppose to remodel that! More like bulldoze it down
the road.and start from scratch. You can do it! I said and turned
While driving through West Virginia, we saw cows,my head so that she didn't see me laughing.
horses and wheat fields, right out next to the road. IAfter three months of rebuilding the house and
looked at my sister and said Wow! Real live cows andacquiring live stock we stood back and looked, at each
she laughed at me again. Next stop on our journey toother and said "we did it," two New York City girls
Texas was Arkansas, were it was wide open plainshave been transformed into real live cowgirls. And all it
of wheat and cornfields. The house were 2000 totook was a broken leg, two black eyes, and a busted
3000 yards apart, now that's living I said as we passedlip! And that was just from me trying to clean the barn.
the farms. Let's find a place to sleep, Nancy said asNancy suffered a much worst fate; she had to kill
we drove down I40 towards Little Rock Arkansas.dinner every day for six weeks, because of my
We found a horse ranch just outside of Hot Springsbroken leg. Can you picture her passing out every time
and stayed there for the night. We asked our host Mr.she picked up the axe? If you can't! It went much like
Daniels all kinds of question about growing up on athis. Nancy would walk down to the barn and open the
farm. Mr. Daniels our host said, you ladies never visiteddoor, as soon as she saw the axe, down she went.
a farm or milked cows before? No sir, I said born andShe picks herself up and goes for the chicken and she
raised in New York City, I said. Real live city slickers, hefaint again. Now she has the axe in one hand and the
said as he walked out of the kitchen. Follow me I'll givechicken in the other and sprawled out on the barn floor,
you ladies a taste of the farm life.chicken clucking and trying to get away. She picks
Ok, we said as we walked out of the house andherself up, the ax in one hand the chicken in the other
down to the barn. As I walked down to the barn withand screams up to the porch, "order takeout" I can't do
Mr. Daniels and Nancy, I noticed that the horse ranchit! I just can't! I'm no murder.